Dear Mother,
I love you. I love so much that I feel the pain of the cancer just as much as you. I am who I am because of you is a line that I've said many times before. I want you to better understand what that means. Throughout my life, I've had many reasons placed at my feet to give up but watching you, I've learned strength. I've watched our stuff thrown on the street multiple times. I remember you telling me one day before school to make sure I had everything packed that I wanted because we we're going to have a home by the time school was dismissed. I remember coming home that evening and seeing our stuff in a pile next to the dumpsters and the neighborhood kids going through it and playing with our stuff... throwing, breaking, taking our stuff. The stuff that once filled our happy home. I remember watching you stand in front of the 7-11 asking strangers for money just so you and I could eat that night. You struggled, you fought, you pushed your pride to the limit.
It doesn't take a man to raise a boy. It takes someone who cares and can love them like no other. You taught me what you knew. Golf and tennis over football and basketball. Who cares if I'm a little bit more sensitive than others or that I don't mind showing my emotions. That's who you raised me to be and if anyone has a problem with how you did, then that's a person who I don't need in my life. I'm proud of the man you made me to be.
I said earlier that I love you so much that I can feel the pain of this cancer. We're going through this together. My life has been turned upside down and I'm learning to live my life differently. I'm learning to live my life with cancer present. Cancer isn't a disease that affects one person, it affects everyone involved. It breaks my heart to see you like this. The woman who I watched defeat every odd against her, be taken down by cancer.
You fought for me, all of my life. It's my turn. I will always be there for you. I will fight when you are weak.
Through everything, thank you for being the most amazing woman and mother in the world.
Love,
Your son